Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
A lot of niggas don't know how to get busy.
1:27 PM Nov 3rd via web
I have recently become aware that many of my friends and colleagues are not sure how to take on a suitable appearance
A lot of y'all muthafuckas just throw on whatever whatever whatever and just think thats whats poppin and it's not poppin man.
1:28 PM Nov 3rd via web
Many of you feel that wearing something you would normally wear to bed or the gym is also appropriate for, say, going out for drinks. But it isn't.
Yo when you step out the crib, just make sure you match. Don't be coming outside on some like you Rainbow man or something like that G.
1:29 PM Nov 3rd via web
When you leave your house it is important to coordinate your clothes and accessories. Bold patterns and solids are always a good bet, but NEVER bold patterns mixed.
With mad different colors and shit and your gear ain't proper. You know what I mean? Make sure your swagger is up to par nahmean. You decent
1:30 PM Nov 3rd via web
Remember our motto: Flashy, not trashy. Make sure that you look appropriate for the occasion. Yoga pants are appropriate for YOGA. Flip flops are appropriate for VOLLEYBALL GAMES. Uggs are appropriate for . . . well, nothing. When in doubt ask a friend for advice!
You ain't gotta come out looking all Super Fly and dapper and all that shit but just make sure that your gear you know...that you official!
1:31 PM Nov 3rd via web
It isn't necessary to wear Marc Jacobs to the grocery store, but some effort is appreciated by those around you. Remember - there is a whole array of attire between formal and pajamas. It's called *blank*-casual.
You can take the wackest gear but make sure that gear, that K-Mart gear, whatever you wearing, you official wit it.
1:32 PM Nov 3rd via web
Again, couture is not necessary. But make sure that it's flattering, wears well, and makes you feel good about your appearance.
YOU bringing the steez to it. Nah mean?!
1:33 PM Nov 3rd via web
Style with ease (yes, I had to look it up. Thank you Urban Dictionary)
Make sure your foot game is official. A bitch don't like you to step to her acting like you trying to bag her with your shoes all bent up.
1:36 PM Nov 3rd via web
It isn't flattering to a lady (or gentleman) if she thinks you assume that she is so easily attainable that you can attempt to make advances in battered old sneakers. Make an investment in a good shoe that will last you awhile. Diesel makes wonderful casual shoes and Prada is pricey - but will last you a lifetime!
Or at least if your jeans is fucked up and you got a decent pair of kicks on, you might could be able to pull a bitch. She might go for it.
1:38 PM Nov 3rd via web
With appropriate shoes by your side you can probably get away with less-than-your-best jeans. A lady will overlook a hole in the knee if she sees a strong symbol of pride on your feet.
Your hair cut game gotta be live too.
1:40 PM Nov 3rd via web
Take pride in your hair as well . . .
Just make sure that your cut is good. If your cut is good and your kicks is good, you might could get the bitch.
1:41 PM Nov 3rd via web
A fresh hairstyle and decent footwear can go a long way with your intended romance
A lot of y'all niggas ain't LIVE. Nah mean. Out of 100 niggas it might be like 10 LIVE LIVE LIVE thats SUPER LIVE niggas!
1:43 PM Nov 3rd via web
Many of you are not as dapper as you think. The likelihood that you are as posh as you believe (according to a recent study by Ghostface Killah) is approximately 1 in 10.
The Rest Of Y'all Niggas Is BIRD NIGGAS! Straight Up!
1:44 PM Nov 3rd via web
The rest of you are mere posers. Seriously.
The type of niggas that just get punched in the face all day, robbed all day.
1:45 PM Nov 3rd via web
You anger society that takes offense to you're attitude of "I'm a trendsetter. Look at me wear Ugg boots with short shorts!".
Niggas that was getting stuck for they cupcakes man back in high school, Jr High, taking your Butter crunch man we know about that shit man.
1:47 PM Nov 3rd via web
These individuals most likely developed this arrogance as early as high school or junior high. As a result they may have (rightly so) been the target of bullying. Bullying, and perhaps a few instances of stabbings for any cupcakes you may have on your person. Bullies know how to expose your weaknesses, and that is usually through brutal theft of your cupcakes and/or your Butter crunches. That will take you down a notch.
Like I said, out of 100 niggas it might be like 10 LIVE niggas out of 100 niggas man and which one are YOU nigga. Point it out nigga.
1:49 PM Nov 3rd via web
1 in 10 individuals truly have style, while the rest are delusional. Which one are you, good sir or madam?
and is you sure about that dude!
1:49 PM Nov 3rd via web
Let's reflect on our wardrobe for a moment. Do you have good taste? Really?
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
2. Grocery boy
3. Applebee's host
4. Grocery night stalker
6. Tire buster
7. Real estate admin
8. Barista (thanks to you Chad)
9. Car salesman
10. Barista at Braun's bar and grill
11. Sam's Club - gas station attendant, electronics sales, and tire busting
12. Sofa Mart - warehouse, routing delivery trucks and delivery driver
13. Race car parts fabricator
14. High-end sculpture awards fabricator
15. Orthodontic Product Designer
16. Real estate admin (calling all those who were in foreclosure)
17. Freelance designer/fabricator
18. Home Depot flooring associate
19. Master Artist at a mannequin manufacturer
20. Warranty department lead
I also have done my fair share of freelance fabrication and repair, and I also helped fix and flip a house. And I suppose you could count 'musician' in there somewhere...
What you got for job lists?
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Friday, September 3, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Saturday, August 21, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
I'm not saying I'm a shoe whore like my dear friend Matt.
I am - but that's not what I'm saying. My shoe issue (I get points for NOT saying is-shoe, like I really really wanted to) is that a measurable portion of my life revolves around shoes.
Shoes make me feel happy. Shoes can make me feel sad. Most importantly: shoes help me see how douch-like the folks I encounter daily are.
Once again I should mention my thoughts on flip-flops. If you have a nice pair, wear them. Wear them sparingly though. Wear them when appropriate. Volleyball game? Yes. Picnic in the park? Yes. To a job interview at the bank? No.
Also - by "nice" pair of flip flops I mean they MUST be made of natural fibers. No foam. No rubber. If you got your flip flops out of a bin for $2.99 - you should probably kill yourself before I do because I will make it slow.
I feel now is a good time to relate a story.
Picture it: Last week I was helping my soon-to-be brother-in-law move some furniture. My sister and I were the best dressed in the storage compound (not a difficult feat). Davey? was wearing flip flops.
Chad: Hey Davey. I'm glad to see you're wearing your heavy duty flip flops to move furniture.
Davey: Hey. Jesus wore sandals and he moved furniture. He MADE furniture!
Chelsea: Jesus wore sandals. Not flip flops.
Davey: Flip flops ARE sandals!
Chad: Not Jesus sandals. Jesus didn't get his shoes out of a bin at Payless.
Chelsea: Jesus probably had a woven leather sandal. Maybe with a sling back.
Chad: A "mandal" if you will.
Chad: I don't like mandals either. But who am I to judge?
Chelsea: You're a good person to not judge Jesus.
Chad: Thank you. I am.
Haha. You can tell Chelsea and I are related. You can also tell that Davey will probably be eaten alive by us within a year.
I should probably confess to something right now. Because Matt is a huge shoe whore I have discovered that when I want to buy shoes I can buy them for Matt. That way I get the thrill of shopping/trying on without the whole selfish feeling/buyers remorse problem! (Also - I know that if Matt should die in an industrial, mannequin-making accident before I can give him shoes, I get to keep!)
These? Are what I got Matt for his birthday.
Now can you see why its a confession?
But I love Love LOVE them!!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Friday, July 9, 2010
The movie drones on about how mouth-breathing Kristen Stuart wants to become a vampire at graduation and her pasty vampire boyfriend will then have sex with her (with, I assume an ice-cold ding-a-ling). Tempers flare when werewolf other boyfriend Taylor Lautner (cromagnon man)tries to put the moves on bland, whitebread Kristen Stuart.
But wait! There so happens to be a vampire army (more like zombies) being assembled, up in Seattle. Beware of Dakota Fanning! She is a tiny carb-faced Darth Vader-type vampire!
Bella kisses the wolf man and the vampire. Why is anyone fighting over dumpy Kristen Stuart anyway? She practically has Rickets from living in the sun-less Pacific Northwest.
Can I have that two hours of my life back?
Go Team Victoria! Whoo!